I suck at this.
Don’t get me wrong, this isn’t me giving up on weight loss. It’s just an honest assessment of the current situation. I started this blog on April 9th, at 197.6 lbs. That’s three months ago – I should be roughly 20 lbs down by now. This morning, I weighed in at 198 lbs. This, my friends, is what it looks like to get off track.
But that’s OK. We get off track, we get back on. I know that I can do this. I just need to figure out what will work best for me.
What was working was going to the gym every day after work, meal prepping, and going to Refuge Recovery once a week. Unfortunately, when I started working my second job, that added another 20+ hours to my work week, and cut out almost all of my free time to work out and meal prep. I do technically still have the time to get to the meeting, but it’s a 2 mile walk at the end of a very long work day, and I’m typically so exhausted that I just don’t have it in me to get there.
The new job also gave me access to all-you-can-eat bagels, and the incentive to drink more coffee and Diet Coke to be able to stay awake for 36+ hour periods, and beer to rewind after frying my brain with so much customer service. In short, this schedule is making it very difficult, timewise and emotionally, to do any of the things I need to do to get the body I want. I’m sliding back into old crappy eating habits out of feeling like I have no time, and “rewarding” myself with treats whenever I’m not working. Gotta stop it.
But I have a few ideas for how to get back to where I want to be:
- The first idea is to start waking up at 5:30 to get in a workout prior to heading to work for the day. I am traditionally not good at this. I’ve been trying for years to wake up early. I don’t like it, and I’m not good at it, but I just have to do it now.
- The second idea is to count calories again, using MyFitnessPal. This is another thing that I’ve done in the past, but with some success. I think it will help me be accountable for what I eat at Job #2, home of the free bagels.
- The third idea is to start taking a supplement stack. Just ordered this one from Legion: https://legionathletics.com/products/supplements/the-30-day-love-your-body-transformation/
- The fourth idea is to take care of myself in other ways, so that I feel a little better about myself when I look in the mirror. Right now, I gotta say that I’m not having a great time, mentally. I’m bloated, and my hair is gross, and none of my (already old, worn out) work clothes fit me well. It’s hard to see my worth some days. But I made an appointment today to go in for an eye exam, and I’m going to get contacts for the first time in ten years. I also scheduled a hair cut with my favorite stylist. And I think I’m going to talk to my dentist about the cost of getting braces, so I can start saving with a goal in mind. I’d rather spend a little less paying back my credit cards if I can have straight teeth and no debt at roughly the same time. Extra bonus: when I had Invisalign, my mouth hurt way too snack mindlessly. That would really help my weight.
- The fifth idea is to see if I can carve out some time to work out during lunch. I only get 30 minutes, but I can at least run up and down the stairs a couple of times.
- The sixth idea is to start looking for new jobs. It’s extreme, and it’s heartbreaking, since I love my primary job, but I can’t afford to keep living like this.